Initially, my favorite Orange Lantern was Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen. But I’m really becoming partial to Noface Korean Ghost Monster.
This is a terrific cover because it tells you everything you need to know about last issue. Also it’s painted quite nicely. I suppose you might also want to remember Dyrge, the Emo God from the other universe full of incestuous gods. I know when I say it like that, it makes it sound like a mirror universe to ours. But that one was destroyed by these gods so they had to come over to the New 52 and pee all over this party too. Not that this party has been going so well. If only DC had concentrated as much on “character building” as they did on “world building” when they began this thing, it might be more interesting on a whole. As it is, I don’t really find the majority of titles compelling. Maybe that’s just what happens when you force yourself to publish fifty two different titles each month. It definitely means you need a lot of writers, so you wind up having job openings for people like Scott Lobdell and Ann Nocenti. I hope nobody misquotes me and says, “Eee! Tess Ate Chai Tea was heard to say, ‘…people like Scott Lobdell and Ann Nocenti.’”
Speaking of liking Scott Lobdell, you should head over to his Facebook Fanpage
and help him get to 1000 Likes! I just checked and he’s at 980! Come on! His Teen Titans sells tens of thousands of copies a month! How can he not have 1000 Likes yet! Get with it, people! He’s an important Writer! Give him some credit! And tell him Eee! Tess Ate Chai Tea sent you!
"Larfleeze #4 Rating: +2 Ranking. I haven’t really liked this comic. Possibly because I allowed my hopes to get too high before being supremely disappointed by its lackluster and trite comedy. But this issue has things moving and I think I’m going to like Dyrge and her crying robot town. I already like those things so I think I’ll like them more later! That’s how liking things is supposed to work! That’s good advice from me and you should remember it next time you’re in a relationship and you find yourself liking your partner a little less every day because that’s not how like works. So don’t listen to the people that say relationships take work! Listen to me saying like is supposed to grow and not diminish! If it’s diminishing, stop wasting your time! You obviously don’t like that person! That advice also works for comic books!"
— Eee! Tess Ate Chai Tea, Novice Comic Book Reader and somebody you should never take any advice from. Ever. Do not do it. Except that advice earlier where I pointed out you shouldn’t ask Lord Google for pics of goat.se. That was sound advice.
"Back to the fight between Larfleeze and the Orange Lanterns, the Orange Lanterns defeat Larfleeze. But then, because they’re all selfish bastards under the influence of the Light of Avarice, they argue amongst themselves about who gets to deal the killing blow. But that’s when they realize Larfleeze has become the Orange Light’s Power Source and if they kill him, they’ll lose their powers too. I don’t know how they recharge the rings though. I mean, I think I do and I think I finally understand goat.se! He’s just trying to recharge his ring!"
— Eee! Tess Ate Chai Tea, Novice Comic Book Reader. If you’re not familiar with goat.se, just ignore this quote. Do not approach Lord Google for answers. Just go about your life in ignorance. Do not make me into a Cassandra and ignore this warning. You will fucking regret it. Just pretend this never happened and go about your life. You’re going to ignore me to satisfy your curiosity now, aren’t you?
This looks almost exactly like my first sexual experience.
I guess Forever Evil: Blight is now well and truly under way even though it isn’t mentioned anywhere on the cover. I only know this is the second installment because of the advert in Red Lanterns #25 that informed me of this huge crossover that won’t be done until March. As long as most of the issues don’t just seem like filler, I’m good with a crossover. I mean, you have to do something with all those long stretches of time before death.
Last issue, Constantine, The Nightmare Nurse, The House of Mystery, and Chia Swamp Thing had summoned Pandora, The Phantom Stranger, and The Question to the Rock of Eternity. I think this is Justice League Dark’s first recruitment drive. It’s like those issues of Justice League when all the heroes gather aboard the Watchtower to be judged worthy by Superman and Batman and Wonder Woman. I think I’d do well in an interview with Batman because I’m equal parts grim and sassy but I don’t think I’d cut Superman’s mustard. I can’t even imagine what Wonder Woman would expect out of me. Hug a murderer? Put a small animal out of its misery? Discuss the dynamic between power and gender in Austen’s Pride and Prejudice
Upon opening up the comic book, it looks like I’ve gotten ahead of myself. The Rock of Eternity Recruitment Drive probably gets set up later in this issue since Justice League Dark #24 ended with Constantine and The Nightmare Nurse and Chia Swamp Thing and The House of Mystery just beginning to formulate a plan to save the rest of Justice League Dark. It looks like the real Swamp Thing is going to take some offense at Chia Swamp Thing being on the team and make an abrupt appearance. Which is good since he’s one of the heroes Constantine is trying to locate.