Catwoman #2

Does that Gargoyle have a Prince Albert?
Okay, now that the Batman and Catwoman sex scene is out of the way, we can move on with the rest of the comic. Hopefully, the first issue is a sign there will be a kind of reversal of the usual Catwoman/Batman relationship. Usually it’s filled with sexual tension and blue bat balls. But now, right from the start, BANG!
Now I hope Batman will be bitter and whiny and hateful because Catwoman never bothers to call him back or acknowledge him and he gets all stalker-like (more so than usual) and clingy. And Catwoman will be all, “Dude! Be cool!” and “Act like a man!” and “You’re like a bat to me!”
But I doubt it because that would be different and interesting and Judd Winnick is writing this comic. Oh! Burn!
Sorry, Judd Winick. I would have written that line if nearly anybody had written Catwoman. Except maybe Peter Milligan. Or Grant Morrison. Or Warren Ellis. Or John Ostrander. Or Peter David. Or Keith Giffen. Or Steven T. Seagle. Or Brian Azzarello. But anybody else and I probably would have used that joke!

I really tried to find an image of Robin in this position for this issue’s photoshop.
Before things can get moving, Batman needs to leave! What’s wrong with Batman? He never hangs around Commissioner Gordon when he’s done with him! He just disappears as Gordon keeps talking. I’m pretty disappointed with Batman’s One Night Stand Fu.
Catwoman is the one to get dressed and run off.

It’s good to see Judd still using his ‘again’ punchline.
I also tried to find the clip from Real World San Francisco where Judd explains his comic strip is funny because the character in it is doing something dumb ‘AGAIN!’ But that just led to me watching one five minute clip of Puck and not being able to stomach any more. The other roommates might have been in the clip as well but they were all so boring, who could tell?
Catwoman ends up stealing the Russian’s horse painting that is worth nothing but all the different clans want it anyway. So she sets up a drop at a Bruce Wayne charity function, offering to sell it to two separate clans.

Bruce Wayne recognizes her as Catwoman immediately. It could be her face is very distinctive. Or he remembers every inch of those boobs. Or maybe her Cat o’ Nine Tails she’s using as her belt.
During her big night out, she kisses Bruce Wayne,

gets a bunch of Russian mob guys to kill each other,

comes home to find her friend dead in the apartment,

and meets Mr. Bone!

Pretty good night!
I think Catwoman needs to be a little more cautious about her whole secret identity half of her life! It’s no good wearing a mask if you’re just going to let anybody looking up see you go into your apartment in full cat getup!
If I’m ever found dead and half-eaten in my apartment, these bastards are to blame!

Pelafina and Judas being disgusting.
