All the super villains want a piece of Static’s ass.
Last issue, Piranha and Paleman (the Joker like-a-look) bought some drugs called ‘Q-Juice’. It’s supposed to give normal people super powers. But so far, it’s only managed to kill five of Piranha’s men. So the dealer decides to show Piranha the Q-Juice Demo Model to prove that it works: Guillotina from the cover.
Her hair is razor wire!
The demonstration convinces Piranha to buy more of the Juice to make more super villains. This Q-Juice was used in Dakota during some past DC historical event (or Cartoon Network event) called the Big Bang. It seems to be where Static got his powers. And a number of other people. Probably every goofy villain that Static had to fight each week on the cartoon.
Also, it turns out Paleman is working undercover to infiltrate this crime ring that Piranha is involved in. I don’t know who he’s working for exactly. Just another shadowy government organization, I guess.
This time Piranha’s Q-Juice works and creates a whole bunch of wacky critters for his criminal super army. And even though they’re just criminal punks whose powers manifested randomly (those that didn’t die from the Juice), they seem to have come around all set up with a name and an understanding of how to use their powers!
In the 15 seconds this guy has had his powers, he’s named himself a stupid name, learned how to use his powers, and defeated Static Shock. That’s some gooooood Q-Juice!
Static Shock is captured but not killed. Piranha thinks he owes him an honorable death at sea. But he should have been killed for using lines like this:
What business? The business of transforming into super villains?
I let Static Shock off the hook for too long. It is going to drop one ranking after this issue. The only real story going on here involves his sister and what happened to her. The other half of the story is a criminal syndicate that wants Static dead. So issue after issue, Static is fighting gangsters and super villains while he spouts stupid lines in every other panel. The comic needs more meat! It needs something to care about. Perhaps it’s relying too much on pre-DCnU history? I wouldn’t know since I never watched the cartoon or read any other comic books with Static in them. Thankfully, I only have four more issues of Static Shock to go before it’s over. I hope its replacement comic is more interesting and not written by JT Krul.